Unplugged.

Last night I was in bed oozing with disdain over my somewhat dependent and addictive relationship with Facebook and his homie Twitter. I felt an epiphany coming on, and the need change this pattern of reliance on cyber "relations" came to full fruition. At 12am, in a moment of strength and clarity, I got out of bed and removed myself from the Matrix. I didn't feel it necessary to remove my Myspace account as I don't have the same addiction to it. So for now, Myspace, you are safe. There are several reasons I had to come to grips with the fact that this shit just isn't cool for me right now. For one, as an artist type I have felt the need, over the last few years, to have people know and understand my work and vision. These applications are useful and important when you have a product to sell or a show to promote, etc. This is when it made sense to me. Folks attend shows, buy cd's, and become fans. Often, this happens and it is a good thing. I have a clear understanding of the power of this platform and its use. For this, I am grateful. Currently, I am not doing shows or slanging product.

There is something extremely narcissistic about social networking tools that cause us to NEED to be heard, listened to, appreciated. We convince ourselves that "being out there" will make us more popular,loved, cared about. Dare I say, understood.... It's a farce. It isn't what's really going on. Instead we become these online personalities, bullhorns. I feel the less we make this shit about "me" and the more we begin to think about the collective "we", the better of we will be.
For Twitter, I feel like I was spending too much time "crafting" something intelligent or witty or tongue-in-cheek in order to get my point across. I see others doing it, too. Granted, some folks and organizations are using it to create a real dialogue to create social change and progress. But a GREAT many folks, self included, sometimes use the tool to have virtual conversations with each other about their day, who they hate, what they ate, and frankly, I/We don't give a flying fuck. I am more interested in what is in between the lines. There is a total disconnect with real life shit and with each other and we are left with a one-line manifesto for the day via the Matrix. It feels empty. There is no real conversation. I thought that alot of these folks I have continued conversation with on Twitter or Facebook were truly my friends and they are not(I began to realize this when I started reaching out to ask for things or to connect on projects via email or telephone and never got a response). Granted, some people are and will always be dear to me and I them. But our relationships stretch out further than a computer screen. Many of the people I communicate with via the Internet have not picked up the phone to hear my voice, in a long, long time.
And as far as Facebook goes... if I ain't talked to ya in 20 years, why the hell do I want to talk to you now? Because it is safe to do so online? Because other people you want to know or dialogue with are talking to me? It all strikes me as a who knows who form of wack ass high school popularity scheme. I'm sure that if I saw most of these people in person, they would get on my last nerve. Yes, there are a few I was thrilled to see. Will I exchange phone numbers with you and have a 3 hour conversation catching up? Probably not. Will we ever meet for lunch or meet each others husbands? Probably not. The organic relationship built by contact, voice, touching, love, and eye contact, is becoming more and more obsolete everyday. It saddens and scares me. I think an inner voice deep inside thought that if I stayed present in cyber space that I would be relevant in these people's lives and I know that I am not. I am no more relevant the other 200 million users out there.
We are all plugged in. This is some for real Matrix shit. I know, I know...Balance is key. I got that. But personally, I have been so plugged in lately I haven't created anything with my own two hands in a long time. My addiction has kept me from my most organic self. It is nearly impossible to commune with God on a daily basis when I am plugged in. The powers that be want us all to be plugged in. "They" want to be in on this conversation and control our every move. We can't even plot and plan on over throwing the system anymore because folks are too scared and uncomfortable to pick up the phone and make plans to meet and commune in person.
I used to spend a great deal of time alone. Even though I may be alone in my home, the computer is always there calling me like a fucking crack dealer and it is stifling my progress and creativity. Even something as simple as writing quality content for this blog has fallen short due to my lack of dedication to my own art and appreciation for my true self. We don't need to get kudos from muh fuckas on a daily basis to know our worth.
I think I'm going to Facebook, Twitter, and Myspace God for a minute and see what comes of that.